Miss Universe

Miss Universe is over, it didn’t end smoothly, but you’re going to be okay.

Whether it was a telepromoter error in the end that lead Steve Harvey to announce the wrong winner at Miss Universe 2015, I can’t tell for sure at this point. I can still make my point either way.

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I have for a long time found it interesting and annoying that we seem to either take great pleasure in, or vent extreme anger at, other people who make “cringe worthy”, or “tragic” errors that really have very little impact on our lives. It’s especially easy to do so through SM, from a distance, so there’s quite a lot of if to go around. I’m guilty of it too. My theory: I think it’s because we, ourselves, are so uncomfortable watching something like Miss Columbia being told to surrender her crown after having just done the victory wave and cry, we need to make it right in our own heads in order to get on with our lives.

It probably has to do with our own experiences in similar situations that we, as a result, relive subconsciously, or are actually forced to visualize in our minds. I realize most of us haven’t hosted Miss Universe, or any live television whatsoever. But, we may have MC’d a friend’s wedding horribly, or done a presentation at work disastrously, or even just said the wrong thing at a dinner party. As for myself, I misquoted Shakespeare on live TV, and that’s just one of, and not the worst of, my blunders. Anyway, it doesn’t have to be something of epic proportions to the rest of the world- just brutal in our own fragile minds. So, in a way, your brain is saying, “Well, that’s just great. Like I needed to think about that awkward moment from my past again. Thanks for that Steve Harvey! Maybe I’ll feel better if I take it out on you a little.” Maybe it’s that we worry about something as dreadful happening to us in the future and are displeased at having to imagine how we’d feel.

Well, I’ve got news for you: Steve Harvey has enough of his own anguish and embarrassment to manage without having to also worry about how we’re all doing after his live TV debacle. (And, by the way, if it was a telepromoter error, he “manned” up big time and didn’t try to pass the buck in any way; even if he did have a cue card to refer to). But, I’m not trying to flip this on his behalf, and say, “give the guy some credit”, or “live TV is hard, cut him some slack”. I’m just saying if you’re going to make it about yourself, (which you are if you take to social media to savage a man you don’t know, who was hosting an event you have nothing to do with and weren’t even at, just because you can’t figure out how to sooth your brain’s squirmy discomfort), make it ALL about yourself.

Think not of what you can say to make fun of or be angry at Steve Harvey, but instead- maybe think of what you’ve done that went really, really well. That’s an option. Or, if you’ve got a scathing sense of humour, think of something that hasn’t gone well for you, and take the piss out of yourself. Either way, you’ll feel better.

In fact, I suggest you immediately turn focus on yourself anytime something happens that makes you feel inclined to have a laugh at the expense of someone else, or express rage at their error. The laugh you have, or the satisfaction you get from posting your critique are short lived. Whereas, the processing you do of your own public displays of Miss Communication might be more enduringly beneficial. At the very least, the world will get back to normal much sooner.

Think of an embarrassing moment you’ve had. Does it not seem glaringly obvious that when that person came up to you later to say, “Hey just curious; did you mean to have your fly undone for your whole speech?”, was really just trying to find a way to make themselves feel better? Either that, or they’re a bit of a jerk. Or both.

Wouldn’t both of you have “moved on” much more quickly from this unfortunate instance if they had instead made it about themselves? You already knew you were mortified by what happened, you didn’t need their assistance in recalling, or confirming.

Next time this happens, just tell that person they’re gong to be okay. It’s not like having your fly undone is contagious.

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