For the first time EVER, I had lunch with my father and my mother, just the three of us. READ what happened when my stepmom came home early.
My “Man Brain” and I get into enough trouble on our own as it is; we don’t need any assistance with digging ourselves deeper into any holes of disapproval, thank you very much. Yet, at a recent Brunch with friends, I found myself in the glaring spotlight of unpopularity with the Momttendance because of a comment about a younger woman. Even worse, the “I just don’t understand the ‘Man Brain’ sometimes” comment about me came from a woman whom I had just met! But, what was worse than the even worse, was the comment that got me into trouble wasn’t even made by me- it was uttered by my WIFE!
If my calculations are correct, it will be anywhere from 3 months to 6.25 years before at least one of my kids realizes just how cool I actually am. That approximates the window of time between which my oldest child and youngest child graduate from high school. I’ve based this estimation on the scientific evidence I observed in how the perception I had of MY parents changed upon embarking for a post secondary education. I figure, despite how complex and wildly unpredictable the teenage brain is, there are certain consistencies to the human experience that are reliable in determining when your kids become aware of your true swagger.
As an entertainer, with a background in stand-up comedy, radio, television and performing live on-stage at various events, you might be surprised to hear that I consider myself an Introvert. It wasn’t until I had a discussion with my father years ago that it became clear that we’re BOTH Introverts. He a retired doctor of medicine; me a comedian; both cut from the same cloth, indeed. Not only did I now have an enlightened view of my own persona, but it helped solve an ongoing mystery in my relationship with my wife, who is most definitely an Extrovert.
Recently, I asked my wife to look me in the eyes so that I could tell her that I love her. “Oooohhh my G-d, you’re such a freak!”, was her response. An odd reaction, yes; unless you’re familiar with my penchant for adopting new schtick to improve my person and the world at large. At any given moment, and without warning, you might find me: vitamixing avocado pits; writing sexy love texts; reading my financial statements aloud; wishing happiness and prosperity for people who annoy me; buying locally manufactured ties; and promoting self-awareness and empathy as the keys to utopia. The latest thing I’ve come up with- I have declared myself to be on an Anger Strike.